My body in flash-back was awesome..

 I am 5 foot 6 and weight 170 pounds. There I said it. Well also I am anonymous hence easier to "say it" :D Now I am FAT. But this feeling that I am fat is not new. Its funny and sad that I thought I was FAT when I saw 18 yrs and 52kgs. I thought I was FAT when when I was 23 and 62 kgs.  I thought I was FAT when I was 25 and 58kgs. Its not funny it is plain stupid. Was I blind or did I never see my pictures! I wonder. Today when I look at my pictures when I was 67kgs with a one year old baby.. I freaking look good, actually I do look the yummy mummy that my friends told me I was. At that time I thought they were being polite. Why did I dislike my body so much? What did my poor body do to me? I know the answer it was pressure or it was comments. My friends were skinny .. not to be mean but yes they were sticks, I had boobs and butts like an 18 yr old girl should have. They called me FAT.. to make themselves feel better. But I bought into it. The truth was I saw skinny and they were sticks.  I had a bloody purrrfect body.
Why do we women find it so hard to love out body? The body honestly does not have any say in how it looks. Its the two Ms - Mind and Mouth, that makes our body what it is. My mind tells me I am fat and my mind gets sad and then my mind tells my mouth lets eat and offcourse the mouth eats and eats and eats till the body becomes like the drum, I am treating it like. A huge rounded drum.
Today I apologize to my body for being so disrespectful and not loving it when it when it has done nothing not to deserve it. And my mind is saying kudos.. now lets go eat! Freak show man.. freak show.